After 20 some years of thinking I needed mentors to tell me where to go I find myself wondering if those same mentors actually mute many other people’s dreams before they ever get started or even try. After reading Jun Loayza and Ryan Paugh’s posts about mentors I decided to share with you the comment I left on Jun’s blog. Here is my comment and after that go read his post.
Actually, I think if I would have had a mentor I would be 25 steps backwards on where I am today. For 20 something years I have had amazing parents, friends, and coaches tell me the path that lie ahead. Is that where I am at? Nope. All of them told me what awaits, what I ‘needed’ to do, and where I ‘had’ to go, yet that is not where I am, who I am, or what I have done. My boss at work 6 months ago told me ‘you have a lot to learn son’ and yes, yes I do, but 6 months later I sit with him planning a new strategy around social and blogging.… Lesson: We all have a lot to learn.
Like yourself Jun, I fought the urge to be content with the lifestyle I was told to lead and if I had listened to the ‘mentors’ I would still be in Illinois probably working at Caterpillar trying to climb some ladder that didn’t really exist. I would be sitting at a computer knocking out a checklist of one specific job all day.
I could have had all of that lifestyle if I would have listened to what you described as a mentor. But now, all of those mentors call me and say the same thing, ‘wow you are up to some amazing shit. I wish I would have done that stuff.’
While I listen to that comment on repeat in my life lately I always have the same thought.
It is exciting, humbling, and gets me all stoked to wake up everyday, but the only reason I am where I am today is because I didn’t listen to the people who you would describe as a mentor. I could see the path no one else saw and that my friend is why I like teammates and not mentors. I know they all are/were trying to help but it is those small comments that can kill dreams, vision, and stop most people in their tracks from doing what they truly believe. Mentors, though not even realizing it, probably kill more dreams/visions than they create. They provide security and mitigate risks because that is usually the path they have lead (at least in my life.) Bad? Not at all. Just what most know.
Awesome post Jun and I stop, think, reflect, smile, and say thanks so much for running alongside me in the recent months. If you ever need a teammate in this game then you let me know because you have been here for me already on a number of occasions. Here for ya.
-Shane
What makes me an expert? Nothing. I am just a guy who enjoys helping people find career paths that they didn’t know existed. I strive to help people ask questions and think about things a little differently. Life and Careers are about asking the right questions. Please ask us anything, or just subscribe to the The Squab feed via RSS or Email to receive notifications of new posts.
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Photo Credit: Mike 52
